A heart, grown cold in Winter's home
Mute and alone, joy becoming unknown
A man, how he wanders, believing to know!
That he is one with thyself, but such things aren't so.
Behold, spring does arrive and with it, thy heavenly glow!
Salutations Parameshwara, burn off the mirthless snow!
Melting all, most of all this ignorant, isolated soul.
A heart now full in dedication to you, The valley of my soul, now without cold, Blooming in Your spring, the life that you bring.
Raghava,
I have never seen snow but can feel the chill here and then somehow even flowers are evoked and light and warmth. It is very evocative.
You might consider playing around with some lines to place obvious rhymes within rather that at the ends. (check out Shakespeare)
If you can find a way of saying 'believes' instead of 'believing' and 'becomes' instead of 'becoming'
you will give it more energy.
If you read it aloud a few times you will hear where the rhythm stumbles.
I recommend Stephen Fry's book "The Ode Less Travelled" subtitled "Unlocking The Poet Within"
And I look forward to more from you,
Lyndal